If I’m so smart, why do I feel so inadequate?

March 14, 2018

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Walking into the banquet hall where all my colleagues congregated for the annual conference, young professionals’ chit-chatting, some catching up after a few months, others simply getting connected for the first time. I could hear my heartbeat so loudly and beating faster and faster as I walked closer to the entryway of the hall.  As my heartbeat grew louder, it seemed as if my being got smaller; disappearing by the second. Shuffling through thoughts in my head: I can’t go in there; will not fit in there; I do not belong, I resolved, and consequently, turned around swiftly and made a dash back to my car and off I went, back to my hotel as though I could find the parts of me that just disappeared in the hotel room. What I didn’t tell you is that I flew 4 hours for this conference and here I was, having a solo conference said my client we’ll call Tami.


If I'm so smart,  why do I  feel so inadequate?


Have you ever found yourself in a similar situation? Where you felt so invisible, felt you didn’t belong, felt like no one sees you or hears you, or felt inadequate, just not enough?


These moments rob you of expressing your true essence.   You are not able to speak your truth. Your truth and opinions are lost, buried in a bed of lies that you are not good enough or you are not enough.


“I know I am smart. I have been told I am smart; it’s the reason I am a part of this honored set of people. And when we were in school, my grades confirmed my aptitude, so I don’t understand it: If I'm so smart,  why do I  feel so inadequate?”–Tami brooded over this and it’s what led her my way.


Life happens to each of us once we are born into this world and our responses to them are all up to us and believe it or not, they shape our day to day in adulthood.  The stories that have been etched into our brains and minds by people in our lives and the stories that we tell ourselves over, dictate how we decide, even in moments where we want desperately to speak our truths, in moments where we want to show up.


Make a Decision - Are you Ready?

So, how do you feel what you know (smart) ? How do you start feeling that sense of adequacy, brilliance, smarts, and capability because you know it to be true?  How do you give that room to be your guide as opposed to the stories in your head? For me, it was a decision, l had to Break The Mold.


I knew I couldn’t do it alone and I had to be willing first, to ask for the support and help, willing to confront that which had enveloped my truth, my voice, and heart.  I had to shed the covering and to let go of the veil covering my truth, light, and my essence.


Then, I did the work (It was an internal job) and, in my process, as I discovered and uncovered increasingly more of my essence, I became bolder, confident, carried myself with a true sense of self belief and love as Tami is doing today.


I know where you are because I’ve been there before and I can help; it’s the reason I have created the Break The Mold program.  Do you have the same questions Tami and myself had at one point?


If I’m so smart, why do I feel so inadequate?


And my questions to you are:


Are you going after the life you really want?  Are you having the experiences you desire? Are you showing up authentically? Or are you shrinking at the intone of “not being good enough?”


If this is you, I invite you to schedule a free Breakthrough session with me. I'll help you:

  • Create a clear vision for what you want.

  • Identify the biggest obstacle standing between you and your goals.

  • Figure out the next best move you can make to take back control of your life and start expressing what you know to be true for yourself





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