Everyone was on their feet, clapping, wide smiles, some whistling, and others waving their hands vigorously as though to catch my attention. I stand there eyes filled with tears welling up from so much gratitude and awe for what has just transpired. I seemed to have moved 2 thousand souls in the crowd and they are cheering me on and saying thank you in whatever form that they can. I take a bow over and over, and over again with my hands clasped together in front of me moving from about the height of my nose to right by my heart – Deep Gratitude! And then I woke up – Alas! Yet another day dream or visualization….
So I was astonished at the idea that I was about to shy away from this opportunity that stood before me that was quite frankly a no-brainer!
A TEDx Talk Event?
In front of 100 People live and hundreds others watching live? Uhmm…No thank you! It’s not the right time! Ever get caught in that thought cycle of “It’s not the right time?”
Wait, what? It’s not the right time? You just got Certified as a Certified Fearless Trainer less than 2 weeks ago? So when is the right time? Or when is the time right? If you are worried about being qualified – You are “Certified” – and you have been leading a “Fearless” walk and coaching others on how to lead a more ‘fearless’ life AND “Fearless” is in your title – When is the time right?
This was the banter – the self talk that went on in my head back and forth, when I was faced with the opportunity to give a TEDx talk this past week. I had just completed my certification as a trainer and naturally it was time to go out and begin giving talks and holding workshops.
Alas, my voice of fear said it just wasn’t the time. I couldn’t have possibly been ready for a TEDx talk – it’s impossible – You must begin small; like 4 people at a time; you know, build your way to that. Some call that Self limiting beliefs – You must start small!
I, Bisi wrestled with this decision– I knew I had to do this talk which seemed so scary and out of my comfort zone, yet I tried to avoid the opportunity. I eventually made a decision (after many check in’s with people that eventually became accountability partners for me) to give this talk – After all, what I want to share has nothing to do with me. In reality, it is a Gift I want to share with as many people as I could – It’s a gift to the audience and to the world at large. This was my opportunity to touch as many souls I could at once to help them begin living their lives fearlessly, even if it’s just a shift in their thought process. Besides, this would be a dream come true if I went ahead and achieved this goal.
So, I put together 5 Tricks to Help me stay committed to this goal and although each step carried its own weight and played a role in achieving this goal. One of the most impactful was having Accountability Partners and a support system.
From the onset, I had Carrie – a co-worker who seemed to believe in me ask if I had applied for the talk. She made it her business to check in with me every other day to see if I had applied for it. – She hounded me because she simply believed in what I could offer.
Accountability Partners come in different forms – friends or non-friends; however, they are a cheerleader in your corner;
They are willing to hold you accountable for your actions and in this case, my potential. And Carrie stood as a cheerleader in my corner.
An Accountability partner is challenging yet not condemning and I found that as well. I had people in my corner willing to offer an ear for me to practice while they challenged me along the way.
To have a successful accountability partnership, one must have courage – the courage to own your stuff; the courage to speak your needs out; the courage to risk vulnerability. In that vein I posted what I was embarking on, on Facebook (a very scary and out of character for me because I would otherwise hide) and I was and still am amazed at much cheer and support I received.
No matter what happened at this point, at the talk, I decided
“the world is for me.”
I was determined to move forward and gift this talk even more than I had just been gifted by my FB world, my coworkers, and other Accountability partners. And that is the power of Accountability.
Needless to say, I gave my TEDx Talk on June 22nd in New York City on “How to Build Confidence in the Face of Fear” in front of 100+ Live audience and streamed to 100s of others who watched online and it was successful.
If you are interested in learning more about how to build your confidence, be held accountable and want to be surrounded by a group of individuals who are committed to elevating themselves and others, Join my group at www.soweelevate.com
Lastly, if you are still going in circles trying to achieve that goal? I strongly suggest you grab a copy of my 5 Tricks to Help You Stay committed; and having an Accountability Partner is Non-negotiable!